Good Morning, Taiwan
- Me: (screaming from downstairs) CHIWEN!
- Chiwen: WHAT?
- Me: COME HERE
- Chiwen: NO!
- Me: WHY?
- Chiwen: I'M CHANGING
- Me: WHY?
- Chiwen: BECAUSE I WANNA LOOK IMPRESS!
blogasaurus mess
pretty baller.
fucking love meryl streep!
hot lesbian mess.
there's not a lot more to say, really.
oh, badass.
so the other night i’m out eating all-you-can-eat sushi with chiwen, because what the fuck else would i do with chiwen. and my life. anyways, i’m all up stuffing my face with raw fish and shit, turn around, and see this crazy asian ho teaching poodles how to exercise with fucking ball implants in her arms.
i thought i had mercury poisoning. and then i found it on youtube. how: google searched “japanese poodle workout”. what the fuck is happening to my life you guys?
Good Morning, Taiwan
- Chiwen: Oh my gods. You never believe it. Someone put the poop all over the bathroom at work!
- Me and Katie: What?
- Chiwen: No, seriously! Like, look like a shit bomb. Why would someone poop all over the republic?
- (background info: Chiwen works at banana republic)
holy shit.
went to wales with the oriental and the mexican. highlights (this has to be at least a week of good morning taiwans):
1. chiwen got drunk and fell asleep in the front row of our flatmate’s dance performance.
2. chiwen and I taught everyone how to speak welsh (video to follow).
3. chiwen started a fire in the toaster at the hilton buffet breakfast.
4. we all missed our bus, and the mexican and the oriental started screaming at each other over the phone about interrupting.
5. chiwen fell asleep on the guy sitting next to her on the bus, and then wacked him in the face.
6. for british mother’s day, chiwen talked to my mom on the phone and explained to her that:
a) she was drunk
b) her mom is a student and, I quote, “she study loads random course like how to drive the boat, teach kid about the birds. yeah”
c) she had to go because she needed to drink more
True Life: I Live With An Asian
ericmortensen:Great Chinese State Circus performs Swan Lake
holy crap balls. i just pooped my pants. twice.
Daily Dilemma (Jason Beauty Mask Edition): Chiwen or Jessica Simpson?
Good Morning, Taiwan
let me just tell you a little story about chiwen lin:
she came in my room this morning wearing this, abducts my computer to watch a j-lo performance in italy, claps when i guess the language, and then asks me re:perez hitlon ”what is it means when theys said ‘smelling the golden diggers’?”
i fucking love my life.
Its funny how us asians talk shit about white people but we always end up with them some how.
preach!
can i just say that i suffered through some hardcore asian karaoke
for chiwen’s birthday. and i sang eminem’s lose yourself with an irish girl. badass. then i smashed frosting all over chiwen’s fake eyelash. she was pissed. unglued it in front of the entire club. that’s what i call uninhibited, people. know that.
