March 2010
65 posts
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(805):
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash...
– texts from last night (my home area code, baby!)
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look watchya did, you little jerk.
– Uncle Frank, Home Alone
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February 2010
70 posts
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you know who glenn beck reminds me of
the mean lawyer against kris kringle in the 1994 adaptation of miracle on 34th street. everytime he comes on, i feel the urge to scream “CUZ SANTA DON’T GOT A GRUMPY FACE!”
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um...not where i came from. we's gots some mad... →
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TV Shows The Networks Didn't Want to Admit Were... →
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Funny or Die Presents...Drunk History
FD: ABRAHAM LINCOLN, I AM FREDRICK DOUGLAS, A FORMER SLAVE
AND HE’S LIKE
AL: SHHHH! I GET IT. I KNOW. I KNOW WHO YOU ARE. ITS BEEN EXPLAINED TO ME. I’VE BEEN FOLLOWING YOUR CAREER FOREVER. BE QUIET. I’M INTO IT. LET’S TALK
I WILL DO MORE ABOUT HIM BUT I’M GONNA LAY DOWN. MY LEGS ARE SHOWING. I WANTED TO LOSE WEIGHT BEFORE THIS. WAIT, DON’T SHOW ITS TOO WHITE.
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I ate a lot of vagina.
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bath and a book
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katie just compared pieces of popcorn to the astro...
pot is good.
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Ikea Song: Story of my FrÜken life
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Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index is smoking some...
In a newly released report of the Happiest Cities in America the index voted Santa Maria, California number
um...WHAT? If the rate of teen pregnancy and unaccounted for illegal immigrants qualifies as community happiness, then yeah, but really?
ok...
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big fucking hershey products
so i was just thinking about robin williams, and his live on broadway when he was talking about the snowboarders in the winter olympics getting marijuana tested. he said the olympic committee deemed marijuana a ‘performance enhancing drug’, and robin williams said ‘the only way marijuana is a performance enhancing drug is if they put a big fucking hershey bar at the end of the...
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happy valentine's day. happy chinese new years.
happy whatever-the-fuck-you-celebrate day. or both.
i feel you.
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morning rant
ok so i had a dream that i came up with an amazing new word that combined tranny with something else, but now i can’t fucking remember the other half! tranasaurus? FUCK, i don’t know. hate that.
two: there was a fucking mouse in our trash can last night. katie flipped out so bad i thought she was for sure paralyzed for life. and now i can’t handle the kitchen.
also, i just...
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Sarah Palin is a fucking retard.
– Stephen Colbert
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drunk and wearing flip flops on fifth avenue
– from Poses by Rufus Wainwright
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save the peak hollywierd →